For many years, my love life could have been described as a Hollywood drama with a tragic ending. (Complete with sequels.)

I did not understand why I kept attracting men who were emotionally unavailable.

Over the course of 20 years, I was abandoned six times — as in, going out for ice cream and never coming back. I'm not exaggerating here. For example, I once had a boyfriend disappear on me while I was very ill and in the hospital. I just never heard from him again. No closure. No goodbye. Just *poof* he's gone.

The interesting part was how many people would say to me, "Beth, you are smart, funny and pretty. You have good values and a big heart. You are every man's dream. Why are you still single?"

The contrast between people's view of me and who I was inside was like night and day.

Finally I faced the truth about why I wasn't finding a really good partner who loved me. I was a big fat ball of mess inside and needed to heal those wounds before I could attract the man I actually wanted.

 

I believed men would abandon me — that I had to be perfect or I didn't deserve to be loved and cared about — but I hear other single women say things like, "There are no good men out there!" Or, "Men can't handle my level of success."

Of course, these are just the stories we tell ourselves to keep things familiar … because having what we really want can feel strangely scary.

I wish all those years ago I'd had the resources I have now to break the patterns I was in … to understand what was really going on and attract one of the really good men who are in fact out there.

Once I saw what was *really* going on and fixed it, my whole love life changed. I began attracting different men and I no longer felt I had to be perfect to be loved. All of the stories I told myself for why I was still single disappeared and I began to see that I really can have (and deserve) the kind of man I want. The great thing about realizing that it's not him, it's you, is that you can create something different … what a wonderful idea: that you can change your love life by changing who you are inside and what you believe and what you know is possible. It's a whole lot better than believing other people need to change so you can find love!

This week a special giveaway is happening and I wanted to share it with you in case you are ready to find love, too.

It's called the Ivy League Love Academy, and it was put together by my friend Sandra Fidelis, who is a relationship and dating coach. (I finally met her in person this summer and she is awesome.)

If you want 2015 to be the year you experience true love and higher possibilities, I recommend you check it out. You'll get instant access to thousands of dollars in resources … free. You'll see who the experts are and which ones you resonate with so you can learn from them.

Click here to request your gifts … and remember, always be yourself.

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